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A Parenting Truce

I won’t notice the schmutz you just rubbed on the shoulder of my best dress if you won’t notice how long it’s taken me to wash your blankie.

I promise not to always give you the hardest chores in the land if you promise to ever hang up your coat without being asked.

I promise to overlook your unusual style choices if you overlook my complete lack of style.

I promise to get you to ballet on time if you promise not to hide your shoes.

I promise to stop snarking at you if you agree to stop snarking at your brother. It’s sort of a cyclical thing I know, so I’ll stop first. I’ll try to be the grownup.

I’ll start getting all your laundry cleaned and folded each week if you stop putting clean, folded laundry back in the dirty clothes hamper.

I’ll try to stop actually hurting you as I brush your hair, if you try not to wince and scream out when you feel the brush’s aura approaching your head.

I promise to teach you everything I know if you try to understand that I don’t know that much.

I vow to learn what you have to teach me if you promise to be patient.

I promise to love you. No strings attached.

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