Throughout my children's lives, I have been working in some capacity or another, although it hasn't always been for profit. Between school, church, and community activities, I have always had something outside of the home to keep me busy. The problem is, because I have such a strong desire to be better in the various roles of my life, I was trying to do too much in too many areas. So, I decided to just focus on two jobs: wife and homeschooling teacher.
My husband, on the other hand, encouraged me not to give up on my true passion — writing. Since beginning my blog at dahgurl.com, I have been so blessed by the doors opened to me and the wonderful cyberfriends that I've met, but I have to tell you, my children aren't handling my new career as well as I would like.
As you know, I've had household organization challenges, and since Rome wasn't built in a day, I have to stay on top of the kids to make sure their new habits stick.
But lately, I am out of the house more. I've been working on an audio CD series and hosting a new television show for women (more details to come — it's in the pilot stage now). DH just didn't know what all his encouragement would lead to...
Sunday, I was out at a CD recording session, and DH was in charge. Our oldest was sick in bed. The boys were on punishment — writing a report on how they can be better siblings and better members of our household (hey, I'm running out of options). My youngest daughter was taking her nap, and BBB was on the loose. He tiptoed away from DH, went into our bedroom, and decided to bathe in the hair oil — AGAIN.
Could someone please tell me what's up with boys and creams/oils? My youngest has covered himself in Vaseline, Eucerin, and my expensive hair conditioner. When he heard someone coming, he decided to clean the evidence off with my barely-worn royal blue suit that was hanging on the bedroom door. Because I had just worn it to church that morning, and since I was rushing from church to the studio, I had left it there instead of putting it in the closet. (Thumbs down for Mommy and her bad habits.)
When I called home to let them know that I was on my way back, my oldest daughter broke the news to me:
"Mommy, the baby... Now don't get upset, you're driving."
I immediately saw glass and blood.
"Just tell me."
"He played in the hair oil again, but this time, he got it on your blue suit."
Deep breath. "Okay, talk to you later."
I just shook my head. See, I have had a few revelations since my new business — well, not really new, but reactivated business — has taken off in the past few months: I can't do everything, but the things I can do, I have to do better. And that includes getting better at forgiving myself and everyone else.
I wanted to be angry, but it's just a suit, and as much as it was a nice suit, I didn't wear it very often. I wanted to feel guilty that I wasn't there that day, but that only lasted a minute because I am always there for my kids when they need me. I wanted to be critical of myself and my bad habits. (Maybe I should have put the hair oil in the cabinet in the bathroom instead of on my dresser, even though that's where I use it most of the time?) Instead, I arrived home and calmly let the kids tell me about what else had happened while I was gone.
"Mommy, did you know that one of the poles in the banister is loose and Kiserian fell through it when he was sliding down the stairs?"
(Didn't I tell him not to slide down the stairs anymore?)
"Mommy, it burns when I go the bathroom. Imani says I have an infection. That's yucky. Can you fix it?"
(Why would my oldest daughter scare her 4-year-old sister by telling her she has an infection? How about offering her some water or some cranberry juice until I can take her to the doctor?)
"Mommy, can I go over to Daniel's house this week? Please?"
(Now, why am I going to send you over to a friend's house when you haven't learned how to get along with your own brother? Sorry bucko, not gonna happen any time soon.)
"Mommy, I talked to my natural health teacher and she says that I need tea tree oil, peppermint oil, eucalyptus, and some lemons to clear up this congestion. Can you go to Trader Joe's for me?"
I took a deep breath and went to my room.
As I slipped on the hair-oil-covered floor and landed on my behind, I started laughing and crying with love for my almost-perfect children, and their almost-perfect mom.