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Separated Parents Can't Agree on What Gender to Raise Their Child

The Short of It

Exes Michelle and Kyle share custody of their 4-year-old Aubrey. With his mom, he's a boy. But his father feels Aubrey should be a girl, resulting in serious gender confusion for their child.

The Lowdown

Aubrey was born intersex with ambiguous genitalia. Despite knowing that their child had chromosomes that indicated he is 70 percent more male than female, the parents proceeded with a surgery to make the baby a girl and put a feminine name on the birth certificate.

Early on, Aubrey played with boy toys and identified as a boy. His mom allows him to embrace this side of himself when Aubrey is with her. She even cutting his hair into a boy hairstyle.

But Kyle wants to raise Aubrey as a girl, and in his care, Aubrey is told to dress like a girl and play with girl toys. It's an understatement that this child must feel extraordinarily confused about who he is.

It was actually Kyle's new wife, Brittany, who was concerned enough about Aubrey to contact Dr. Phil, and the three parents appeared on his show to discuss the child's situation. In a clip from the episode, Michelle asks Aubrey if he is a boy or girl, and he responds "boy." And while Brittany claims the child most often behaves like and identifies as a male, she says Kyle puts pressure on him to be a girl, which can skew Aubrey's answers about his preferred gender.

In fact, Kyle says on the show, "Michelle needs to take a look at that birth certificate and see that Aubrey is female. She shouldn't be trying to change that."

The Upshot

Clearly as Aubrey grows up, it will become more important to make a decision about his gender. And if he chooses to live as a transgender male, both parents need to support him. More than anything, they need to get on the same page!

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